Where do I begin…
Ta, you were my right hand man. By law you were labeled my primo but over time I confided in you like a brother. When I got back from such traumatic circumstances after such a long time of being away, you brought me in with open arms. That’s what you were, so open minded to anyone or anything in life. I got to see a different part of you from what everyone could have ever perceived you as. We had made such a connection of our life’s. From me being the only girl growing up with you and your three brothers (my primos) and brothers, I only ever saw you as my guardian angels who protected me and the first boys to show me to be tough. The support from words, to actions, memories and first time experiences… I want to say thank you. We had goals with and without each other that we wanted to see each of us meet. We made a pact that we would never give up and if we felt so to look for one another so we can recollect and remind ourselves that we got this and no matter what God got us. We were best friends. We had our own ways of telling each other what to do without really having to talk. It’s like we read each others minds. I saw you fight life and beat it up. There’s so much I want to say but I’ll be selfish when it comes to the Tata I knew. You’re my guardian angel even long before God decided it was your time to be with Him. I’ll cherish that last moment with you, this I’ll share.
My last moment, your farewell. July 16th. I got back from Colorado and we met at Jojo’s place and like always you were there to help, we wanted you to eat with us. We packed up in the truck and went to Hidalgo’s. You had previously talked and expressed to me all these beautiful and not so beautiful things. Like I mentioned we were there for each other to talk, comfort, make fun of and just be each others guide. Back to my last moment with you, we sat at the back wall next to the back door. You sat right across me. We ordered and you were hungry. You had that one in a million smile on. I love that smile, it was ear to ear… haha i looked at you and said “what’s up dumbo?” You replied with “I love you kid.” He thanked me and Joe for looking out and caring, for always making sure he’s fed and looked out for. We both said our parts. I explained to him that no matter what I would always be there like he was for me… he foolishly then went for my food after devouring his own and said “thank you.” This entire moment of enjoying his company of eating, laughing and crying was really his farewell. The reality was that it’s how God wanted it to go. I was angry I couldn’t say bye to you Ta. That I couldn’t have you smile and say “why you mad kid?” And just uplift me. I wasn’t ready, nobody was but you were. I hold everything I learned and was told by you, even the long talks and crazy cool adventures and all the cool spots we went or planned to go to. Ugh, this is unfair. I just want you here, but it’s true you’re always around and you’re even making ways for me now. I love you so so dearly. Thank you for being the amazingly gold hearted, smart, wild, sincere, most importantly genuine God loving human being. You will forever be with me in everything I do. Te amo Ta. You beat me to heaven. You promised me not to leave unless it was together. We always said “together or never”. See you soon 💚